Stories tagged with "gay"
Dallas
Jack recalls his adventures in the strip clubs of Dallas.
Whenever I make my way through Dallas, Texas, I end up having the most insanely fun time, and I always end up hooking up with the hottest chicks. Yet, it is always one of the most surreal experiences in Dallas. I will undoubtedly find myself in some sort of situation where I either think I'm going to get killed or go to prison or both. It's just a general feeling I have when I'm down in the Lone Star State. Best of all, Texas has some of the most sexy women, either it's because of the weather, good genes, or some other unknown force of nature. But no place on Earth has more gorgeous women. It really is a mystery to me. I used to do these kinds of road trips to the south when I was younger, just to get it on with the insanely hot women. But now I always fly first class. And the great thing is that these girls don't even know they're so hot. So they don't have the same complexes as city girls do. Maybe it's a little of the Kentucky Fried theory, where it's a mixture of the mystery spice and meat that makes them so damn hot. Also, you've got three types of guys, sex offender, the rich guy whose daddy owns an oilfield, and the ass-backward hc, so you've really got a good ratio working in your favor. Once, I was in Dallas for a seminar, it was another boring law school thing, but I really want an opportunity to head down to the south to score some good quality poontang. Plus, the gentleman's club scene in Dallas is truly incredible. It is a known fact that the strip clubs in Dallas feature some of the finest women on the planet. The first time I went to Dallas, I hooked up with a few strippers that were staying at this really Swank hotel, and it was a glorious experience. All blonde, all shaved, and all-natural, just how I like it. This particular time I was staying at one of the shittiest Dallas hotels, but it didn't matter to me. I was still gonna get my dick. What? One night I decided to hit the strip clubs. Let's put the strip club scene in Dallas into perspective. You've got your menu full of dollar vodka drinks and Margarita that come out of a can. You got your obsessive-compulsive stagehands collecting stray dollars. You've got your alcoholic regulars taking down shot glasses like it's medicine. You've got your jocks who you can't tell if they're going to watch the game on the plasma screen or watch the naked women literally spreading their junk all over you like it's butter. Most of these women are actually quite respectable. They're not like Las Vegas strippers. Most of these girls are just paying their way through nursing school and not trying to support their boyfriend's meth habit. They have an amazing girl next door look that really brings them to life. They don't look like they need to be rescued from a dungeon and fed beat 12 vitamins until the color comes back to their face. There's something about girls with big tits natural tits that makes them healthy and fuckable. One night I met the most healthy and fuckable chick at the club. She was blonde, had a gorgeous double D's, and was surprisingly going to school part-time and Chapel Hill to become a lawyer. We met not while she was giving me a lap dance, but when we bumped into each other, she was getting on stage, and I was trying to leave. We talked after her set and ended. We hit it off. I told her I needed to get some rest, but she gave me an invite for something she was doing the next night it was a Monster Truck Show. The next night I headed to the show, and it was everything you'd expect to see a Monster Truck Show enormous trucks flattening other trucks, a surprising lack of teeth in the audience, and a lot of beers being handed around with nobody claiming particular ownership. It definitely wasn't some Nintendo monster truck madness version of a Monster Truck Show. It was the real deal. It turned out that the stripper was moonlighting as one of the girls that hold up a sign each time a new truck driver came out to do his show. After the show, we hung out under the bleachers, which seemed like a very southern thing to do. I remember thinking if I was going to have sex with a girl, I needed to act fast. So we went back to my hotel and had insanely rough, sweaty, amazing Texas sex. After we lied in each other's arms for a good 45 minutes, she laid it on me; her boyfriend is a notorious crime boss and the owner of almost every major strip club in Dallas. I thought, oh shit, I'm dead for sure. I had the option of skipping town altogether because I thought for sure there was going to be a Texas jihad against me. However, my dick had other plans. The next night I went back to the strip club just to see her one last time. I headed over there, watching my back at every turn. When I got there, I noticed that her husband was indeed sitting at one of the booths doing some sort of paperwork. I didn't think he knew because I immediately saw the girl, and she sat right down on my lap. She whispered in my ear that he didn't know anything and wasn't going to know anything. She also whispered in my ear to follow her to the back of the club. We lived through a back door to talk in the back parking lot. I was treading on thin ice. It was about 2 am and about 90 degrees outside that we walked over to a Cadillac. I can only imagine whose Cadillac it was in a brazen and shocking move. She invited me to get inside, so I obliged like an idiot. We were fooling around, and it was getting pretty hot. Mind you were in a mob boss. His card on fucking his wife. It was a death sentence. All of a sudden, the worst happens; two of his cronies come outside and see us getting it on in the Cadillac. I was freaking out, and she was laughing hysterically. The cronies went inside to alert the boss. He came out, and I jumped out of the car. I was sweating profusely, and he walked up to me really close to the point where his lips are touching my ear. His breath smelled like whiskey and potato chips in the thickest southern drawl I have ever had, he whispers in my ear. I don't mind. I'm gay. I just keep her as my wife to maintain appearances. I was blown away by his admission and also relieved. It was one of those feelings of relief that makes you want to curl up in a ball and go to sleep. He then asked me to act like I'm hurt when he pretended to punch me in the stomach and to look scared when he told me to never come back. That night. That girl came back to my hotel, and we fucked a few more times before I skipped town. Wherever she is right now. She might just be fucking a complete stranger in her husband's Cadillac, and he is totally cool with it.
Rating: 5/5 (total: 29)
